Your Life Matters More

You know who you are - the dedicated office warrior who routinely burns the midnight oil.

You're the one hunched over your computer far into the night, convinced that the company simply cannot function without your tireless efforts.

The endless emails, the back-to-back meetings, the ever-growing to-do list that haunts you even in your dreams.

You've sacrificed your personal life, your health, and your sanity, all in the pursuit of proving your indispensability.

But don’t you realise that they see you just as another replaceable cog in the machine? Don’t you see that’s how the system is designed? It’s for all us office workers to be disposable, easily swapped out with another willing slave while the money flows to the top of the pyramid regardless of what happens to you. Be under no illusion, we are living in a debt slave system that does not care about you!

It’s a harsh truth to hear.

A new broom sweeps clean. You arrive at your new job, eager to please. Before you know it, you are working 12 hour days. And for what? Money? Recognition? Afraid you’ll be fired? Then the years go by and you find yourself more and more drawn into the game. That’s when the opinion starts to form in your head that “this company would go under if it wasn’t for me”. And you make sure everyone knows it.

Except no, it won’t. The company doesn’t even notice you’re there. If you were really that important, you’d be the CEO. And Exco and Board level people don’t talk like that.

You’ve built yourself up into this all important role of indispensability to justify the ridiculous hours you’re working. You’re sacrificing time with your family, not eating properly, not sleeping properly, wound up like a top ready to snap at the smallest incident.

For what?

Then you might say that you have a responsible job, that your bosses keep piling the work on, so it’s not your fault. You get abused, ignored, even shouted at by those seemingly above you, and you just take it. You go home and take it out on your family. Those feelings of rage and injustice building up inside you like boiling lava.

Sooner or later it has to come out.

You start to resent your job and resent the people who don’t appear to be working but are getting paid more than you. You start to resent anything that resembles joy or living the good life because you’re so trapped. You become this unpleasant, grumbling, shell of a person who is not so nice to be around.

And I get it, you have bills to pay. You’re drowning in debt, not sure how you’re going to get from one month to the next. You have this high powered job that you worked hard to get, that you thought you really wanted. Now you are just stuck and have no idea what to do. So to avoid the pain of facing the mess you got yourself into, you just work more.

You are a replaceable drone in the corporate world. But you are an irreplaceable asset with your family and friends whose bonds of love cannot simply be transferred or reassigned.

You are a number on a spreadsheet in the corporate world. But you are a magnificent, all powerful spark of All That Is here on earth. Your capacity for love, empathy and creativity are profound gifts.

You are a temporary asset in the corporate world. But you are a source of life, love and protection for your children. The role you play in their lives is exclusive to you.

Focus on what matters here!

As cliché as it sounds, ask yourself if what you are doing will matter in 5 years. What will have more impact in 5 years – a presentation you just had to finish? Or missing your loved one’s birthday again because you had to work?

Look I’ve been there. I was that office worker, sitting alone in the middle of town at 2am working on budgets. Back then I had no idea how the system worked. Then I started my own business, the first 3 years was brutal, I worked crazy hours to build my brand. I was single with no obligations to fulfil. Around that point, I started to awaken and look around. The world was not what I thought it was, (a letter for another day).

Fast forward another decade, we landed a huge project. We were hired to take over an enormous project that was in an absolute shambles. This is stuff we’d done a plenty of times before, so we had no doubt in our ability to sort it out.

What we didn’t see coming however, was the galactic levels of corporate bullying, lack of communication, vicious abuse and lack of leadership. They put us through months of the worst hell we’d experienced in nearly a decade. We were literally working 15 hour days, week after week after week. No break, no weekends off. My rock solid team that had worked flawlessly together for years with zero incident, started fighting with each other. I lost all my confidence and became little more than a blithering idiot.

I was in tears constantly and bitterly disappointed in myself that I could not handle the challenge being directed at us. I had spent decades training myself to rise above such things, not take things personally, stand up for myself, operate in corporate with ease. I failed. This one short project brought me to my knees. I never saw my farm, nor my husband for the entire time. All I did was sit behind the laptop trying my best to get this thing done.

After 4 months of chaos, I pulled the plug. My team was broken in pieces, our psyches were in tatters, our family lives hanging by a thread, and my health started to suffer. But we had values we stood by and respect for ourselves. We recognized quickly how toxic this project was to us and chose ourselves instead.

It took my health nearly a year to recover after we left. We also had post-traumatic stress disorder for at least 8 months after that project. It took that long to stop panicking every time we saw an email come in, a Teams message, WhatsApp or phone call. That terror in the pit of your stomach at every notification took months to subside.

Oh we made money, lots of it.

Do you think the money was worth it?

Years later, those people are all out of our lives, but our husbands, friends and families are all still here. God knows, we gave them little reason to love us during that project...

 What did I learn?

I learnt that money means nothing if you don’t have your health and people that love you.

I learnt that mental and physical health is the foundation to a fulfilling life.

I learnt that I have a lot of respect for myself and do not deserve to be abused under any circumstances.

What are you learning while you’re running around like a chicken with its head chopped off?

So let’s get crystal clear here :

• No job is worth compromising your well-being and putting yourself in harm's way with overworking, stress, or toxic work environments!

• You are irreplaceable in the lives of those who love you. No job could ever replicate the space you occupy in their hearts.

• Neglecting self-care can (and will) lead to burnout, depression, anxiety, and other health issues that will severely impact your quality of life.

• Self-love and compassion are your birthright. Taking time for yourself, setting boundaries, and engaging in activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul are essential for survival.

• Your worth and value as a human being are not defined by your job or career; you deserve to be respected and valued regardless of your profession. You are so much more than just what you do to earn a salary.

• Life is precious and fleeting, and sacrificing your well-being for a job that doesn't reciprocate your dedication is an unwise and ultimately self-destructive choice.

• Your hard-earned wisdom is a precious gift to the world. Your experience has made you strong, wise and resilient. You do not need to accept a lesser life.

Don't let someone else hold the pen and write your story. Write your own story.

You deserve to live fully, to nurture your soul, to put yourself first.

Learn to respect yourself and your needs.

Because you matter.